{"id":1089,"date":"2017-12-22T19:03:48","date_gmt":"2017-12-22T19:03:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.just-family-law.com\/blog\/?p=1089"},"modified":"2020-05-12T14:12:00","modified_gmt":"2020-05-12T14:12:00","slug":"separated-families-at-christmas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.just-family-law.com\/blog\/index.php\/2017\/12\/22\/separated-families-at-christmas\/","title":{"rendered":"Separated Families At Christmas – How to Arrange The Perfect Christmas For Your Children"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/a>Imagine one of those Christmas ads. Children flying through snowy clouds, skating across ice, sharing bedtime secrets with a benevolent monster. I think you know the sort of thing I mean.\r\n\r\nAnd the final scene - the delighted children opening their presents around the Christmas tree ...<\/pre>\n
… The Perfect Christmas<\/em><\/h4>\n
What I would like to do is ask these children, let\u2019s call them Emma and Ethan, if they\u2019re having a great Christmas. That\u2019s if I can attract their attention away from the presents.<\/p>\n
First of all, Ethan.<\/p>\n
\u201cEthan, are you having a great Christmas<\/em>?\u201d<\/p>\n
He doesn\u2019t look up. He\u2019s tearing Christmas paper from a large present.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhere are the batteries<\/em>?\u201d he says.<\/p>\n
Don’t Forget The Batteries!<\/h4>\n
Yes, fair question. Where are the batteries? There\u2019s a chance the shops are still open. Buy some batteries so this doesn\u2019t happen to you.<\/p>\n
Now let\u2019s try Emma. She\u2019s a bit older, and is carefully examining her smart phone. Maybe she\u2019s checking to see if her favourite game app has downloaded.<\/p>\n
\u201cEmma, are you having a great Christmas<\/em>?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI haven\u2019t seen my Daddy<\/em>,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
She\u00a0looks up briefly. Her eyes are sad ...<\/em><\/pre>\n
Turn your focus away from the Christmas tree (an enormous Norway spruce covered with flickering lights) and notice the children\u2019s mother, Ashleigh. She\u2019s sitting on the sofa by herself and doesn\u2019t look too happy either. This is because her ex, Matt, has sent her an angry text.<\/p>\n
Matt\u00a0immediately regretted sending it. But right now he\u2019s justifying himself to his parents who are sitting around an artificial Christmas tree that\u2019s been mended with tape. It\u2019s the same old tree that gets dragged out every Christmas. They couldn\u2019t be bothered to get a new one, what with not seeing the grandchildren, yet again.<\/p>\n
But why does it have to be like this?\u00a0Can we have a happy ending, please?\u00a0The sort of happy ending where the children see both their parents at Christmas, and both their sets of grandparents? Yes, of course.<\/pre>\n
Let\u2019s time travel back a few weeks<\/h4>\n
Here again is the sitting room, the children\u00a0playing\u00a0on the floor, and Ashleigh sitting on the sofa. It\u2019s just an ordinary day.<\/p>\n
But\u00a0Ashleigh is looking intently at her phone. She\u2019s been texting with Matt.<\/p>\n
They have agreed that come what may they will put their personal feelings aside and do what\u2019s right for Emma and Ethan.<\/p>\n
They have acknowledged they must work together. That they must put their children first.<\/pre>\n
Separated Families At Christmas – What Arrangements\u00a0Can Be Made For The Perfect Christmas?<\/h4>\n
Ashleigh and Matt\u00a0have agreed they will take it in turns each Christmas. This year Emma and Ethan will be with Matt on Christmas Eve and with Ashleigh on Christmas Day. Her parents will be coming over, too. There will be a happy house full.<\/p>\n
Let\u2019s reimagine\u00a0the perfect Christmas\u00a0ad …<\/em><\/h4>\n
It starts on Christmas Eve<\/em>. The children\u2019s faces glow with happiness as they tear open their presents around a brand new and splendid tree. Matt and his parents sit on the sofa, smiling and laughing.<\/p>\n
Now the ad moves to Christmas Day<\/em>. The children\u2019s faces glow with happiness as they tear open their presents around an enormous Norway spruce. Ashleigh and her parents sit on the sofa, smiling and laughing.<\/p>\n
… and\u00a0 let’s ask the children if they are having a great Christmas …<\/em><\/h4>\n
Ethan doesn\u2019t look up, he\u2019s too busy fitting the batteries into\u00a0a strange, eye rolling monster. Now ask Emma. \u201cYes,\u201d she says, excitedly, \u201cWe went to Daddy\u2019s and he gave me a new smart phone.\u201d She checks to make sure her favourite game app has downloaded.<\/p>\n
… and please don’t forget to\u00a0agree the presents<\/em><\/h4>\n
Ashleigh and Matt agreed a Christmas present list<\/em> for the children, and who was going to give them which present. This means the children didn\u2019t receive duplications, and neither parent felt the need to compete with the other. Presents can be another bone of contention for separated families at Christmas.<\/p>\n
The children give Ashleigh the present Matt helped them buy for her. Fluffy reindeer slippers with huge antlers. She loves them!<\/p>\n
Heart warming -\u00a0the long awaited and eagerly anticipated perfect family Christmas. Merry Christmas to all!<\/pre>\n
 <\/p>\n
Contact Joanne Houston on 01962 217640 for free advice<\/a> about making arrangements for your children<\/a> with their other parent. In this 20 minute session we will:<\/em><\/p>\n